The Jetsons Meet the Flintstones (1988)

That’s Grass.  I Read About it in Ancient History.

Friendboss Josh requests the darndest things.  He requested today’s movie a while ago, but it felt like it was the most inappropriate time to review it immediately after I reviewed Magic Mike.  Today’s movie is a kids movie that answers a question I’m sure someone must’ve asked about what would happen if two of the most famous families in children’s cartoon history met, so suffice to say the movie won’t be banging it’s cock against my head as I write the review.  I don’t recall being that big of a fan of either of these two cartoons in my youth, nor do I really remember having seen this movie before today, so I get to go in fresh for my review of The Jetsons Meet the Flintstones, written by Don Nelson and Arthur Alsberg, directed by Don Lusk, and starring the voices of George O’Hanlon, Henry Corden, Mel Blanc, Penny Singleton, Jean Vander Pyl, Julie McWhirter, Daws Butler, Janet Waldo, Jon Bauman, Hamilton Camp, Don Messick, John Stephenson, Brenda Vaccaro, and Frank Welker.

George Jetson (George O’Hanlon) is having trouble at work as his boss, Mr. Spacely (Mel Blanc), is finding all of his business ideas are being preempted by his rival, Cogswell (Daws Butler), but he finds it easier to blame George.  When George investigates, he finds out that his trusted computer R.U.D.I. (Don Messick) has been seduced by Cogswell’s computer, S.A.R.A. (Janet Waldo).  Thousands of years in the past, Wilma Flintstone (Jean Vander Pyl) and Betty Rubble (Julie McWhirter) are trying to convince their husbands, Fred (Henry Corden) and Barney (Mel Blanc), to take them on a nice vacation, but Fred gets it in his head to gamble his savings to make more money to take them on a nicer vacation, succeeding only to get him and Barney fired when their boss, Mr. Slate (John Stephenson), finds out that they skipped work.  Fred and Barney try to take their wives on a much cheaper camping trip instead, but they’re none too pleased.  It’s not made much better by the fact that George Jetson’s son, Elroy (Daws Butler), accidentally used his time machine to take his family back in time to the Flintstone’s era.  After a couple of mix ups, the Flintstones wind up in the future and the Jetsons are stuck in the past.  Then hilarity ensues.  Also, George’s daughter, Judy (Janet Waldo), spends most of the movie being a whiny bitch.

This movie was not fun times for me.  It felt like it was way too long even though it was only an hour and a half.  It just seemed like it was an easy idea, hastily thrown together.  I’m sure some people probably thought it would be an interesting idea to see what would happen if the two biggest families in Hanna-Barbera came together.  They were wrong.  They just took the idea and put in every possible combination, got the last drops of their ideas out, and ended it when they were spent.  First the Jetsons and the Flintstones meet in Bedrock.  Let’s have Fred try to use George’s futuristic stuff to help with Fred’s cornball idea to get his job back.  Out of ideas?  Alright, the Flintstones are in the future and the Jetsons are in the past.  Then they get famous and enjoy it for a bit, but then they don’t like it anymore.  Now we put both families in the future.  Gold!  Out of ideas.  Wrap it up quickly and put a price tag on this mamma jamma.  I don’t know if even kids would still find interest in this movie.  It’s mostly slapstick humor that I’m sure they’d be okay with, like people falling down and running into things, but I can’t imagine very many adults still finding this interesting.  What?  The Flintstones want to vacation to Honolurock?  Okay, you’ve won me over.  That’s just good writing right there.  They do have a couple of attempts at some funny wordplay, in their defense, that some parents might have liked.  They’re not funny, but they’re present.  There’s also a pretty good deal of humor in the movie that was even over my head, as I was only 4 when this movie originally came out, making some of their references fly right past me, so much so that I might not even have been aware they were trying.  I would say the biggest problem I had with the movie was that they shouldn’t have done it in the first place.  Putting the Jetsons and the Flintstones together only really serves to cement the idea that they were basically the same stories, just set thousands of years apart, and showing that there was not a lot of creativity in either one.  Another problem I had was with Judy’s whole story.  All she did in the entire movie was bitch and moan about how her rock star boyfriend left her for groupies.  Then she goes back in time and falls in love with his prehistoric equivalent, who then does the same thing to her.  If the prehistoric rocker was truly interested in you on a deeper level, he would’ve clubbed you over the head and raped you, as was their custom.  The time machine also became a source of irritation for me.  It would break whenever the plot needed it to.  I get that.  You need some reason for them to stick around when they don’t like it anymore so you can mine those comedy nuggets out of the situation, but it seriously broke like 20 times in the movie.  The worst one was the last time, when it broke just as the Jetsons had returned to the future and the Flintstones were ready to return to the past.  It was extra annoying because it broke and the Flintstones were talking about what they would do in the future, and then it just turned out their car had absorbed the time-travel juice (or whatever) so they went back anyway.  Why even bother having the machine break again if you were just going to make up some stupid solution a minute later?

I suppose I didn’t have any real problem with any of the voices in this movie.  They didn’t write it, so it’s not their fault.  They just came in and said the words that were written.  I would say that viewing the families through my adult eyes shows me that Fred Flintstone is a douchebag.  This mother fucker is always looking for a way to swindle someone, or use someone, or whatever it takes to be an asshole.  He’s about five minutes into meeting the oblivious George Jetson before he’s laughing to Barney about how he’s going to use George’s future technology, while acting like he’s his friend to get access to it.  Dick.  Also, Judy was a whiny bitch.  I would’ve asked that she be escorted out of the movie if I didn’t want to bang her so bad.  Was she over 18?  I’ll just believe that she was.  Also, why does Mr. Spacely have a Hitler moustache?  Seems like bad form to me.

The Jetsons Meet the Flintstones does not hold up as far as I’m concerned but, having never really been a fan, I also don’t know that I would have ever enjoyed the movie.  I’m sure kids will find it interesting enough as plenty of people fall down, but once you’re old enough to say the words, “To Hell with this crap,” I’m sure you’ve outgrown it.  After that time it’s just got a few sparse attempts at wordplay and some references I’ll have to run past my mom to understand.  The movie just wound up being a boring movie that enlightened me only to the fact that the Jetsons and the Flintstones are basically the same thing.  With as difficult as I’m sure this movie is to find, it’s not worth your time.  The Jetsons Meet the Flintstones gets “Yabba Dabba Don’t” out of “And they can’t kaputt it back together again!”

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